I love poetry.
I had once read a poem on rubies while I was at my Alma Mater.
It said that one way of checking whether a ruby was real, was to heat it to a certain temperature then gently tap it.
If it cracked, it was.('was' coz now it is not one big gem but many less valuable crystals)
The poet applied this to relationships and the poem was just wadafuul.
I never really paid attention to the moral of the poem until today.Today,I sigh over the handful of broken 'crystals' I have.It was today while writing on one my childhood friend's fb wall that I saw the picture of my ex.
Five years ago, I walked away from her, not just literally, but in every sense of the word:I deleted her number, forgot her birthday and ignored her and her family for more than a year.
Before this all I could do was eat-sleep-dream her : from the fourth year of high school to a year after that.I was strung.Every day, I was at her house,not because I wanted to, because I needed to.
But when I left I felt nothing for her.I said, "she would get over it, maybe she doesn't feel as strongly as I do,we are young and don't know what we are doing and I need to regain control of all my faculties," so I left.And haven't looked back ever since.All she had been to me was good, before and after the one year of isolation.I gave her no warning, and no apology after that.I was sure it was the right thing.
Until today.
Today I saw what I left:and I moaned aloud!
And although she has been in another relationship for hardly an year, (which began a week after I changed my fb status to 'in a relationship'-I was just bluffing to get rid of another stalker) she is soooo happy!She is all smiles and lovey-dovey with another guy.
She overcame the rejection, forgot me and moved on.
Wow.
Although I didn't mean to hurt her, I did.A relationship that had began in elementary school as academic rivalry, became friendship in high school and which became exclusive as high school ended just bled to death on my account.
I never thought this day would come but today,while in her father's country of origin, I mourn for the ruby I shattered.
And this is just one.
May God have mercy.
