Hi,
Hope you had a wonderful week, as I did.
I made a promise at the beginning of the year to serialize three chapters of what I suppose was the book that molded my thinking the most in 2010 (Well, apart from Caroline Elkin’s Imperial Reckoning: The Untold Story of Britain’s Gulag in Kenya, -- which I think should be made compulsory reading for every high school student--not to mention the fact that the book is banned in the country. )
Back to the book, The Law of Recognition. It is amazing that the people who we seek to be the closest to we willingly grant them capacity and opportunity to hurt us the most, that’s why I have opted to serialize this chapter on the Mate God has Approved for you.
Before we continue with what Mike Murdock says, allow me to mention the fact that it is the mate God APPROVES for you, not the mate God SEEKS for you. If you are a man, seeking is your job; you are the hunter, so stop waiting for the prey to come to you. Again, you only conquer by going to war. (However, that does not mean that ladies are prey or trophies of way, but hey, si you’ve caught my drift.). If you are a lady, yours is to be prepared and positioned to be found. (I didn’t write these rules, I just found them so.) That is the way the game is played, or so I think. Anyway, there are some aspects that need to be considered:
BEFORE YOU DO:
Think twice if they show little respect for the battles you have won throughout your lifetime. You are a champion…and everyone who celebrates you joins your triumphant procession and is qualified to join you in enjoying your spoils. If they don’t, well…something’s rotten in the state of Denmark.
Think twice if conversation with them has become burdensome. True love energizes. Right people energize you, wrong people exhaust you.
Think twice if they pursue major decisions in their life without your feedback. This is a big no no. If they are building a future which you are potentially part of, at least they should consult you (Aha, there’s the word again) is your input important in their decision making?
Think twice if time spent with them always ends with personal guilt and disappointment. Withdraw from every relationship if guilt, fear, or a sense of entrapment emerges. Love does not grow in such an acrid environment, I tell you.
Think twice if people of excellence do not surround them. It is vital that you study the kind of people that surround your potential mate. To some extent, we are the company we keep, and if we are not, it’s not yet. These people are a clue of your life and future with them.
Think twice if they are unwilling to follow personal advice and counsel. A godly wife is the prophetess in the bosom of her husband. A husband should be a well of wisdom for his wife.
Think twice if you do not admire the mentor at whose feet they sit. Their mentor is feeding either strength or a weakness. If you oppose their mentor, a happy marriage is impossible.
Think twice if you only enjoy them during your moments of weakness instead of moments of strength. Some relationships exist coz of mutual weakness rather than mutual goals. It is crazy important to check this one point out. Your mate should be integral in your support system. How will they help you if in the moment of weakness they are also disempowered?
Think twice if they give you counsel contrary to the word of God. The Word of God is Truth. It will withstand any test. It destroys wrong desires within you. It unleashes your faith. It produces hope. It purifies your mind. It is the master key to your success on earth. It even gets better: according to Hosea 4:6, your reaction to the Word of God determines Gods reaction to your children. Anyone who seeks to shift you from the word of God is covertly seeking to destroy not only you, but also your offspring. (I am tempted to belabor the point, but let me let it rest.)
Think twice if their presence does not motivate you to a higher level of excellence.
Think twice if you cannot trust him or her with the knowledge of your greatest weakness. You already possess certain weaknesses. Your mate is there to strengthen you and not to weaken you. However, child of God, there are Delilah’s out there: if your mate already taunts you with the information you have previously shared with them, no matter how much you are strung by them, shake yourself from their embrace and walk away with your secrets. For Samson, it was a matter of life and death. If you believe it is necessary to hide your weakness instead of sharing it, you may have the wrong mate.
Think twice if you cannot trust them with your finances. Do not alaccept to be bound together with a person too immature to handle the importance of financial responsibility.
Think twice if you cannot trust them with your most painful memories. Every person is running from a painful memory. Help your mate find refuge in this flight. Memories are keys of understanding one another.
Think twice if you cannot trust them with your greatest fears and secrets. Fear limits us. It should motivate us…to change. “Perfect love casts out all fear.” (John 4:18)
Think twice if you cannot trust them around your closest friends. Dr Murdock, (Not I, although I strongly concur) notes that flirtation is deadly. The death of many a marriage began with flirtation. Flirtation is never harmless. Never. It creates desires that the other person cannot righteously fulfill.
Think twice if you cannot trust them in your absence. Are you pensive when they are away from you? Jealousy is a cruel dictator and tyrant. It is often produced by a painful memory of disloyalty and betrayal. When you are all nerves, “Trust, but verify”
Think twice if you cannot trust them to pursue God without your constant encouragement. Truth be told; interrogation will never produce what God’s Presence will produce in a persons life. Even the errors you presently discern will be worked on, only in the presence of God. Even in this matter, trust in the LORD with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding.
Recognition of the mate God approves of you will bring years of joy enthusiasm and fulfillment.
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Hope you have picked a thing or two.I was delighted to share this series with you.
Now that its March, I cant wait to begin serialising the African Dreams, from the surmon teachings of Rev. Julian Kyula, yay!!!
For now,
Shalom.
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